The whole world is going crazy.

A few weeks had passed since Term had started, since I'd seen anyone, since my Dads had been threatened.
Since I'd died.
Moaning Myrtle had started to try and be buddybuddy with me but I'd soon made it clear I still hated her.
And after I'd befriended Peeves and gotten him to annoy her she'd left me alone.
I found myself conversing with Lady Helena of Ravenclaw Tower. She remembered me from my life here and felt sorry for my early death.
Even Nearly-headless Nick spoke with me.
I had more friends in death than in life.
Horrible, really sad.
I refused to show my face to students, or the living in general. I was too ashamed.
My ghostly attire wasnt helping much. The short, fluttery dress, high heels and necklace, paired with my open curls had been my dying appearance and would nevermore change.
There was so much to get used to, not eating (I missed it), not sleeping, (not dreaming, did NOT miss that), never changing..that was hard to get used to, I'd never die because..I was already dead.
I was dead...
I couldnt wrap my head around that.
And I didnt really want to. Another thing I regretted (And I regretted almost everything) was that I had spent my life..romantically alone... No kiss...no nothing..
Then a thought hit me and in frustration I stamped my foot, through a book case.
"DAMNIT I DIED A VIRGIN! ARE YOU EFFING KIDDING ME!?" I shreiked in frustration thinking of my wasted life and not thinking there might be someone there.
A scream notified me of a presence.
I turned around and a matching scream left my lips.
"OH!"

Hearing a commotion in the back of the library, Evelyn considered ignoring it. But noises these days tended to mean not so nice things, so she followed the yelling. At first, she didn't see anything and then her eyes seemed to focus. And standing before her, grey and translucent, was a woman that she had not allowed herself to think of for weeks. Her mouth opened and she heard a loud scream. It took her a few moments to recognize that it was her own throat that was emitting the shrill sound. Clamping her mouth shut, the other girl's own scream ended shortly after like an echo.

Turning back to face the room, and thankfully finding it empty, she held out her hand and took a step closer. "Daphne?" Her voice was cold and vacant. She wouldn't feel, and she wouldn't be sad. At least that is what she told herself. "Daph, what happened to you?" Oh fuck.. Feeling her throat tighten, Evelyn tried to hold back tears that were welling on their own accord. She didn't want to cry, nor did she feel like she should. But she was going to anyway. Her best friend was dead.

"Evie..." my voice choked, I hadnt seen someone alive in weeks..
"I'm so sorry...I didnt want to hurt you...but you see what happens when people mingle with me..Gwen died because of me...and they wanted me to kill my Dads...so I..took the curse for them..." I said softly, glowing white tears on my cheek, not leaving my face, simply dissolving once theyd run down my face.

She streched her hand out and i let her, noticing her shiver when she touched my skin. I was freezing cold. And she felt too hot, like a fire.
Didnt hurt, but it was hot.

"I'm sorry..."

"It's not your fault that Gwen.. died. Or what happened with your parents, it was never your fault." Just because people who knew Daphne died, didn't make her the reason. She knew many of the people who were dying lately as well. But it was too late. Daphne had put her fathers' lives above her own. Evelyn admired her for that, but that didn't make it different.

Daphne felt like iced against her fingers, and she withdrew her hand quickly. She wished that she should hug her, and not let her go. But she couldn't. The tears that had been traitorous enough to build in her eyes spilled over and she closed them. Shaking her head, Evelyn whispered, "Don't be sorry." Taking a breath and opening her eyes, she leaned against the wall, "Don't take blame on yourself for anything else."

"But it is..I was fighting Gwen when she died in the raid. She told me to stop and I didnt. Then a Death Eater hit her while she was fighting me."
I had to tell her the truth, I had been the one battling Gwen, she'd died because of me.
"And I left you, so suddenly. In..both way...I'm sorry for that too...And I know it seems brave, dying for my Dads...But I regret my whole life, All Ive done is make mistakes and that one right choice cost me my life." I floated to the window, the sun making my body almost shiningly gold.
"I am sorry. I wish I'd stayed with you. I wish we'd been on that train gossiping. I wish we were in the common room, right now, talking about your wedding and your honeymoon and you were trying to match me up with somebody and I wish I hadnt died." I turned away from her, unable to bear it.

Daphne blamed herself for Gwen's death, even though she never paid the killing blow. Would it make her feel better to hear about what Evelyn had done? Or would it make her hate her. She wished that she could know the answer to that, because even in her death Evelyn could not bare for Daphne to hate her. Sighing, she decided that maybe it was worth it. "Promise that you won't tell a soul, living or dead, what I tell you?" At the other girl's nod, she continued, "I killed two people. Who I cared about no less. Matt's parents. It wasn't like you think you killed Gwen. You didn't intend for it to happen. No, I actually cut their throats." Saying it out loud like she had made the fact seem more real to Evelyn, "I felt their blood. I spoke to her as I did it. She was awake, and she didn't expect it in the least."

Raking her fingers through her hair, the girl slipped to the ground and watched Daphne. Leaning her chin in her hand, she whispered, "We were never going to be normal. Maybe this is just another weird twist in our friendship. But we can still do those things, you know.."

I gasped at the revelation and floated over to the girl, my ghostly dress fluttering around my thighs as I kneeled before her.
"I still love you Sweetie..." I murmured before mirroring her positin.
I was surprised she still wanted to do those things with me. I was no longer living, not as fun perhaps.
Not that I had ever beenmuch fun. Maybe now I could be.
Ironic, how I had to die to be able to live.

"*sigh* You*re right." I nodded resting my chin on my knees.
Weird how to me I felt solid, but I passed through everything else.
"You'd still do those things with me? Well, we can forget matchmaking with me. Who'd wanna date the dead girl?"

Wiping her cheek, Evelyn nodded, "That's good to know.." At least that was a start, that she didn't hate her. Even if she did, the Ravenclaw was almost past caring. About anything, really. Other than her baby, who was waiting for her at home. She considered telling Daphne that she would meet her at the same place but a little earlier the next day, but she was scared that suddenly the other girl would disappear.

"Of course. It's not like we were secret lovers. We don't need physical contact to be like we were. Before you went a little insane, and before you let your birth parents control you." Her face turning into a smile for the first time since she had started school, Evelyn rolled her eyes and shrugged, "I bet that I could find someone who would."

I ran my fingers through my ghostly curls, not changing their form in the slightest.
"Dont remind me, I know I was insane. I was an idiot" I groaned, unable to keep the ghostly smile off my features.
"Sure, you know, I'd actually believe you, just because it's you. But who'd spend the rest of their lif in Hogwarts? 'ghosts have to spend their eternity where they spent their most time.' so I landed in the library. Ppathetic. I guess I could lice at my Dads home too. Perhaps. Id rather be here though. One Dads a muggle you know. I think living with a ghost would drive him mad." I sighed though my features still carried a faint smile.
"Tell me about you baby, Evie. How's married life?" I also regretted no being able to meet the smallest Masterson in life. So much I had missed.
"Are you well, Evie?" I asked earnestly, she seemed different, distanced, like she was miles away. Intangible. Like I had before I'd died.
I'd do anything to spare Evie my or a similar fate.

"If I could, I would spend the rest of my life here. Right here. With all of the books for entertainment and you to talk to. Plus all of the other students who would filter around in here." Wiping the last of her tears away, the girl considered what she was saying. No, she wouldn't live her life in the school, even if she could. She frowned slightly and sighed, "Maybe I wouldn't. But there has to be somebody who would.."

Her eyes lighted just a little at the mention of her baby. Her smile became a little bit more genuine as she said, "Emma.. is the most beautiful baby I've ever seen. You would have loved her, Daph. I wish you could have met her." Licking her lip and laughed, "Maybe you will.. If I let her go to Hogwarts, that is... and we're doing great. I'm kinda of, almost keeping up with my classes."

Deflating a little, Evelyn shrugged, "I'm doing good. I miss you like hell. Strangely, I am glad that you are hear, but at the same time... it means when I finish at Hogwarts, I won't get to see you anymore." Biting her lip, she ran a hand over her hair. She could enjoy the time that she had with her friend, at least.. that would be better than nothing.

I raised an eyebrow and nodded when she corrected herself, "You deserve life sweetheart. And life isnt happening in the Hogwarts Library." I sighed.
"Emma Masterson, what a lovely name. I'd love to meet her." I nodded with a smile, "What does she look like?" I asked curiously.
Then my smile faded slightly as I sighed again.
"I miss you too, I wish I'd never left, I'll never forgive myself." I ran my fingers over my best friends hand softly, just barely.
Then pain flashed across my face breifly when she said our time was limited.
"Why the limit? I died in my parents house, I can go there. You can go there. We can see each other." my expression was worried and even scared. I couldnt go through an eternity without atleast as much time with my best friend as possible.

"I know.. I just don't think that I am going to be able to handle not seeing you all the time." Sure, they hadn't spent that much time together before her friend left the school. The last time that she had seen her had been in the pale green of her bridesmaid dress. Evelyn wanted to slap herself for not spending more of the day talking to Daphne, maybe the other girl wouldn't have left school and later died.

Sighing, she realized that she should start talking to new people. She hadn't even talked much to the first years like she usually did. Just lead them from the train, then to their common rooms. Biting her lip, she pulled her hair back from her face and looked up at Daphne. "They say that she looks just like me. But there is enough of Cade in her to make her.. perfect. Though, I am probably bias, you may want to see her for yourself before you take my word for it."

An idea came into her head, and she tapped her fingertips on her thigh as she thought. "Well.. you could meet her tonight, if you want. Can you get into the Room of Requirement." Biting her lip when she realized that the room's door and actual location was elusive she tilted her head and said, "What if I were to let you in? I could bring her straight from our house to there. Of course, I wouldn't be able to take her for long.."

Her expression falling, she dropped her gaze to stare at the book case opposite her. Reading the titles of a few of the books, she shook her head and whispered, "You have to forgive yourself. Please.. promise me you will. When you are ready." She couldn't bare the thought of her oldest friend living in guilt for the next thousand, or maybe more, years. "Daph.. That will only last so long. One day, I will stop coming to your parents house. You will start forgetting to leave here. Then one day, I will die and you will still be here. There is always going to be a limit. Even when you were alive, there was one.. but it's different now."

"You'll manage, you're head girl! Congrats, by the way. " the look on my best friends face was heartbreaking to me, i knew her so well. When she asked if I could come to thr RoR I nodded.
"In life I spent almost as much time there as here. I can get there." I smiled softly, "It doesn't matter, I just want to see my niece once" I replied quietly. I wouldn't touch her, wouldn't want her to shudder at my cold.
"I promise, when I'm ready I will" in fact, officially I'd vowed to Start anew so many times...and yet I had been unable.
Maybe one day...
At her next words I wished I could cry.
"I won't forget, but I understand. You're alive. I'm not. This exsistance was my choice. I accept the limits. But promise me two things. That you'll say goodbye when we reach our limit. And that you won't lose yourself like I did. promise me, Evie." my ghostly hands reached out to hers. Passing through.

"Thanks, Daph. I'm surprised that they gave me the position again this year after.. well you know." When she was told that she could still be head girl, even though she wasn't staying on grounds, she really was surprised. Plus, she was hardly the role model for other students, but apparently it was still believed that she deserved the position. "Alright, then.." Looking at her watch, she smiled, "Actually.. I could go and get her now, if you like?"

The girl nodded and stood, "Good. I.. You should be able to be happy. You deserve that at least." She knew that it hurt her friend that she would never be quite the same, but if she let herself she may be have a somewhat pleasant life.. existence. "I promise I'll say good bye, when that time comes. But for now, I have no way of knowing when that will be. Hopefully later rather than sooner, right?"

The second request, well Evelyn wasn't so sure. She wouldn't be able to consciously not do so.. Sighing she shrugged and wrapped her hands around the icy air that was Daphne's. "The second part.. I can't promise so easily. Things are so complicated right now. It's almost impossible to.." Keep it together at all. But Evelyn was far to stubborn to actually admit that out loud. Smiling, she shrugged and looked around quietly, and stood to head home for a moment to bring her daughter back with her.

"You're going to be a great Head Girl, I always had a hunch you'd the the job." she laughed, thinking back through their years at Hogwarts. "You could? I'd love that." Daphne smiled, nodding eagerly. "I don't know if I deserve it, but I do promise I will try. Maybe now that I'm free I can do that." Though, she wasn't really free. But this prison was better than the last.

Evelyn smiled and shook her head. She was still not used to the fact that the girl she'd met on her very first evening in the castle was now dead. She was, however thankful that she was a witch. If she wasn't she would have lost her friend without any more than the letter that had torn her heart in two. "Thanks Daph.. I really appreciate that." Even though she had heard the same words more than once, from Matt, Cade and Taylor in particular, it was different hearing them from Daphne. She knew that the girl would never lie to her, or give her false words.

"Of course I could.. I'll meet you in the Room of Requirement tonight. I can stay and we can talk for hours. Since I live at home, nobody knows when I'm here. I don't have a curfew or anything." She was getting excited about a good chat with her best friends. It would be different to the one that she was currently having. More like old times than like she was seeing her friend, dead for the first time. "You're still the only one I can be myself around. Just plain, boring old Evelyn. These days, I have to be cool to everyone. It's frustrating a bit, but I've been like that for long enough that it comes easily."

"I know you do. I love you, hon" she gave her an icy, but not uncomfortable, peck on the cheek. "Sounds like a plan. And we can stay up as long as you'd like, it's not like I have to sleep." she smiled, thinking that that may be just what they needed. A night together as best friends once again.
"I feel honored, yet obliged to tell you that we have both never been, nor will we ever be, as hard as we may try, 'cool', love. But we've never been boring." she laughed, falling into their old rhythm so easily.

"I love you too, Daph. Always." Evelyn said, smiling as the girl pecked her cheek. It was cold, but it wasn't unpleasant. It was, however comforting. They could be just like they always had been, she knew it. Even if things would be difficult, she could never claim that they wouldn't be worth it. Tilting her head with a grin, the Ravenclaw said, "What are you talking about, Daphne? I've always been cool. You're the one who wasn't." It was mildly true, but she didn't feel bad in saying it. Evelyn was popular around the purebloods, and even some of the other students ever since she began openly associating with her cousin. But others remained cautious of the unknown which was her best friend Daphne. "You're right.. boring was never our strong point, was it?"

Jaysen walked into the library, reminiscing over all the time he snuck into the forbidden section, trying to learn new sorts of magic and beating people in duels, something that he had always wanted to be, the best he possibly could. It had always been suggested that he should have been a Ravenclaw but he was proud to be a Gryffindor. He stepped quietly as he heard voices exchanging and was hoping that he wasn't interrupting anything, he stepped further to see that it was Evelyn and Daphne, chatting up a storm. Jaysen smiled which instantly turned to a smirk as he cleared his throat, "Is there anything I can help you ladies with?" Jaysen waved his wand at a chair which drew itself closer to him as he sat down and crossed his legs, "Or perhaps maybe you can help me, it is tiresome to try to keeping up with my friends. And you guys have seen me since you have started so I think that we can be classified as friends."